Do You Know Your Big & Buffer Goals?

 

Summer is more than just a seasonal transition. 

For those of us in education, it marks the beginning of an entirely new lifestyle. For those of us with children at home, summer requires a whole new framework for childcare and activities to participate in. And so many other professions, roles, and opportunities are redefined at this unique time of the year.

With such unique circumstances, we often find ourselves at the end of summer saying one of two things: "That was great!" or, too often, "It went by too fast...".

This year, don't wait until the END of your summer to find out which camp you'll find yourself in. Instead, ask yourself this question right now:

How do I want to feel at the end of my summer?

You know I love to use Backward Planning in my everyday life, and for the second year in a row, I've been eager to pose this question to you and myself.

Your summer doesn't have to fly by like those of the past if you are intentional about what you want out of it before it begins. Check out my interview on The Morning Blend last summer for ideas to get started.

My summer 2022 word that I've spent time Pondering is: "Balanced".

After getting quiet for some time, I landed on this word, because I realized it was a feeling that I was lacking and one I knew I could intentionally build my summer around.

In my quiet time, I noticed how hard it was for me to pick a single pathway or goal for this summer. I couldn't prioritize only one of the many "hats" I wore, so, instead, I began to list & then narrow them into bigger categories: Self, Mom, Wife, Educator, Author, Friend, Family Member.

Seeing all of these roles was daunting at first, but it explained why I was feeling unbalanced at this point in the year. I was hopping roles and responsibilities so often that I wasn't being intentional about any of them.

I'm a paper-and-pen person, so I grabbed a legal pad and a pen and began jotting these roles out as separate columns on the page. While these roles can overlap, I found that I needed clear, black-and-white categories to help me "unpack" what I wanted to accomplish in each.

I started by trying to set a goal for each of these "hats", but that quickly became overwhelming and seemed like it would be too challenging to accomplish.

I had to remember that my goal is to feel "balanced" by the end of summer--not overwhelmed. So how could I set my path toward this feeling?

Serendipity struck while I was trying to figure out my next step. When Getting Quiet has led me as far as I can go, I often dive into podcasts in hopes of inspiration. And lo and behold, this trick worked for me again.

The podcast episode highlighted the way we rarely meet our goals because of our "all or nothing" mindset. If your goal is to eat healthy everyday and you cheat once, you often throw the whole diet out the window. If your goal is to keep the kitchen clean and it gets back to a complete mess over the weekend, you often fall completely back into bad habits.

This truth definitely spoke to me and my lack of will power.

Instead, she recommended that we set a Big Goal and a Buffer Goal. In this way, we would identify the goal we truly wanted to achieve while giving ourselves permission to flex between that and a lesser goal where we could still find success. It's a spectrum of success rather than a single target for success. Love it.

I tried this with my "Self" hat. 

Big Goal: Intentional workout 3 days per week and Get Quiet 2-3 days per week.

Buffer Goal: Keep “moving” every day (walk, play outside with kids, tackle a physically tiring home project) and Get Quiet 1-2 days per week.

This way, instead of letting excuses flood in the moment I don't hit the "Big goal", I can still keep myself on track by aiming for the "Buffer goal".

I like this strategy, because I know there's no reason I won't be able to meet my Buffer Goal--ever. If I don't, it's because I'm making way too many excuses, and I need to check myself (and the purpose for my goal) again.

And that Buffer goal will keep me moving in the right direction even though it isn't at the caliber of my Big goal. 

In so many areas of life, if we just keep going/moving/doing in even the smallest of ways toward our Big goal, we'd find that that consistency is what makes ALL the difference. No one "feels like it" all the time--it's about pursuing a direction and giving yourself permission to do so on this spectrum from Buffer to Big.

I'm going to continue applying this strategy with my other hats to learn more about what it LOOKS LIKE for me to feel "Balanced".

I hope you'll join me to identify and define what YOU want out of your summer:

1. How do you want to feel at the end of your summer?

2. Why? How do you know? Is there a prior summer that left you feeling positive? What was it about that summer that made it so great?

3. What is your Big Goal? What does that look like for you?

4. What is a similar but slightly "easier" Buffer goal that would still make you feel successful? What does that look like for you?

Guiding questions are essential for me, and I find that I respond best when I Get Quiet and/or jot down my thoughts on paper. Find what works for you, knowing that the work you're doing now is what will help you set boundaries in these next months so that you can achieve the feeling that you're aiming for.

Here's to intentions that inspire results,

Kristy Jean