What Kept You Going?

In my role, I have the great privilege of sitting in on various middle school classes. And each time my hand lands on the door handle to a classroom, I try to establish the same mindset--to be open-minded, non-evaluative, and intentionally focused on student learning. This frame of mind, I believe, is the reason I was able to embrace an experience I recently had in my friend and colleague's room.

Courtney has a strong background and intellect regarding the inner workings of the mind, and she brings this knowledge into her classroom in various ways. One such way is through a daily, "Mindful Minute". The premise: a student reads the provided script, the rest of us participate according to our own comfort level, a few people share their experiences, and then it's over--life goes right back on as usual.

But it doesn't. This practice situates your mind in such a way that you just can't help but feel the lasting effects throughout your day--for students and teachers alike.

On this day in particular, as the Mindful Minute approached, I made a conscious decision to put my clipboard and iPad down and fully absorb this portion of class. The student read in a calm, slow voice, and as I closed my eyes and listened to the topic of focus--"something you're proud of... a time in your life when you accomplished a goal you weren't sure you would be able to..."-- I found myself reflecting on my own growth as an individual, primarily those moments when I didn't think I'd be able to overcome struggles in my life.

And then I had a moment that brought tears to my eyes. Rather than the predictable direction the script could have taken, something like, 'feel how proud of who you are, and use this to propel your day...', the question that was posed struck me more than expected:

"What kept you going?"

How often do we stop to truly consider our motives once we've set ourselves on a course in life? Maybe it's because making important decisions in life entails such a roller coaster of self-doubt in the valleys and blind confidence on the peaks that when we're able to truly take a step in a direction, we just keeping moving...

At that point, maybe we're aching so badly for an ounce of black-and-white clarity in life that we don't sit to reflect for fear that the gray areas will return, muddying the assurance we so resolutely claimed.


'What kept you going?'


What has kept me going? Sure, we can all go through the highlight reel like we're accepting an Academy Award... 'I'd like to thank God, and my kids, and all of my family and friends who got me here today...' and that would be a very valid, honest answer.

But this question got me thinking below the surface. Because as much as God, kids, family, and friends are there to keep you standing, when life falls apart, you are the only one who can take action, placing one foot in front of the other, and there must be something there in those times when no one else can be.

If I dig deeper, my reasons are less concrete. They are abstract concepts like a "knowing" or an "inner peace" or the realization that I didn't know where I was going but I knew that I couldn't stay where I was any longer...

But responses like these aren't welcome in a society where we like things to fit into a box. We like our checklists and our categorizing; therefore, such claims seem indecisive or unfounded when, maybe, they have more substance than all of the other forms of confirmation that we seek.

What keeps you going? Whether it's a life-altering moment in time or a goal that seems just out of reach, what is it that challenges you to put one foot in front of the other? Is it regret? Is it love? Is it another person? Maybe there's a struggle that you can't seem to overcome--ask yourself 'What has kept you from moving forward?' 

Regardless of how concrete the qualities are, I'm finding that mining my own responses to this question are proving insightful, and I hope it will impact you in much the same way.



Here's to black-and-white clarity blended with gray areas of reasoning,



Kristy